Pain | Love

This pain I feel
Obsolete
This pain I feel
Endangered
This pain I feel
Evolved
This pain I feel

Consumed every part of my soul
Driving me into insanity

But

The thought of you brings me
Joy
The thought of you brings me
Home
This thought of you brings me
Hope

I feel structured when I was stuck
I feel helpless when I was here

Pain or not
Love it may be
Hurt or other
It sounded sane
I know for now
I may be in pain
But I am in love.

So I wait.

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Rain

There’s always something to think about in the rain. It’s subtle yet disturbing, people scattering to find safety, and some annoyed by the circumstances look for shelter. Rain always tries to surprise you, with a drop here and there, as you pick up your step you hear the drops catching up to your pace and then suddenly silence, not sign of drops. Pondering for a while, you think to yourself “The rain stopped or am I just imagining, is it true “ but it is not, the rain pours on every step you take hitting the ground like 10,000 drums playing, you suddenly see people shoving each other, laughing, shouting or silently walking clinging on their last breathe, the weather temperature sours and you not only become colder but more agitated as traffic also appears. Rain will either turn your smile upside down or make your grin itch.

Isn’t it exciting though? Rain will never let you down, it will always surprise you and some people need some excitement, or maybe it wont excite you, but will intimidate your anger. Still it will initiate a response of your senses to allow your emotions to speak louder than the drums of the Rain.

Rain is interesting.

Contemporary Venice

It was 6:00am on Saturday the 25th of May, the countdown to Venice has ended, and a new heartbeat took its place. I sat on the edge of my bed looking at my bag, my clothes and my room pondering the fact that this will be the last time I see my room for another 6 weeks. I felt anxious, nervous but definitely prepared, I knew that this experience will eventually change my life onwards, the many journeys that we take in life generally give you some sort of new meaning to what is happening right now in yours to keep and yours to forever cherish, this motivated me to get off my bed and move to the airport.

Rushing through the infamous duty free at Dubai Airport hoping to reach my plane as I was almost 5 min late, I passed through many people going in different destinations in their life, thinking to myself, some are on their usual family trip, some to attend a funeral, some to find happiness, or even work. This time I have a reason, I am those people that go to a certain destination to do something, to achieve something, to find new understandings and to finally maybe better themselves by adapting to a new culture. I have a purpose. I boarded the plane, it was old, smelly and a bit hot but I cared less, I was on my way to the land of masks, to the city of bridges, to the life of the renaissance and trade. I was off to a new exploration, and slept to further ponder on what to expect.

Myself and the programming/photography crew arrived to Venice and moved quite swiftly through passport control and got our bags fast, all good signs from Marco Polo airport until now. Leaving the airport I was surprised because the weather was beautiful, not many would agree with me but I am a sucker for good, cold, uk-inspired weather and we got just that in Venice. We jumped in the water taxi and went to the San Zaccaria square, as we finally glided slowly to the pier my heartbeat was silently tapping my rib-cage wanting to visually see what my eyes saw, it was amazed by the sudden calmness of my body that it needed a break from itself and reach out to see my surroundings. I wish my words could resemble the beauty of this place, the way the people are exceptionally friendly and exceeded almost every possible expectation that I had in mind.

I met Mariam, our mentor/coach/boss and most importantly friend at the pier waiting with open arms, after the quick embrace, I was eager to see where I would stay for the next 5 weeks of my life, where would I be to explore my new age. The apartment was tucked in behind a hotel which was almost 10 minutes from San Marco square (the hustle and bubble of tourism in Venice) and almost 13 minutes from the Arsenale which was my new work space. It was a 2 bedroom apartment with all the needed amenities to go on life with, I was so grateful at that specific moment to the UAE pavilion for giving me such a chance, such an unforgettable chance.

Work has started and we rushed to the Pavilion, we got the boxes organized and books prepared, from press packs to VIP packs everything needed to be done. Luckily the next Adel would arrive to support, and I was looking forward to reunite with a dear friend. At night Venice turned into a dark medieval dragon raining non-stop for hours, making the sea water hit the hard blocks of marble around the grounds of the grand canal, I was so surprised by the weather, didn’t know if it was a blessing or a curse. After having dinner and going through this day, tomorrow is a new day.

Adel arrived in Venice, and the day was sunny with a gush of wind racing along the clouds. After showing Adel the apartment, we then went straight to work, carrying multiple boxes, organizing and giving a helping hand when needed, I felt like we were one team, a true family working as one.

It was time for the Press day (only invited press from the Venice biennale team) and we got our formal Emirati clothes to raise our heads high supporting our own country in a city where history is a piece of treasure. This day was the most nervous of days, due to it being an important first impression to make and how we will cope with this. At the end of the day we had almost 450 media/journalist/visitors (VIP) to the event and this is just within 9 hours. Tomorrow is a new day and a new journey.

One thing readers, and interns coming to Venice:

Venice is not smelly, Venice is not boring, and yes Venice has Wifi.

Welcome to Contemporary Venice, a new world of old Venice.

Arrivederci !

Standing watching a beauty afar

Standing watching a beauty afar

The Power of Assumption

These days it seems easy to assume a situation; we tend to allow our fictional thought into becoming reality. The thought of knowing the truth, observing the reality is hard for some, thus assumption becomes a powerful tool in their coming days, as the truth fades back and watch you unfold reality.

 I become agitated when most people assume matters, mostly because they avoid reasoning the time, the place, why and how it may seem. I am a true believer in everything fiction, I enjoy the world of surprises and interactions with randomness, it will make anyone a more real person than the latter. But assuming circumstances wont allow you to dive into fiction, it will allow you to dive into a lie and getting out of one is deemed unforgiving.

The truth is even powerful, it is beautiful, it will prevail and succeed, I urge all to not assume, to grab the day by its horns as they say. Don’t overthink a situation and most importantly never fall into the power of Assumption.

Travelling with Thoughts

Wilderness

Walking nervously towards the plane I was leaving a place known, a land filled with dense memories, I was able to create a home out of an unknown location. Leaving this was harder than I assumed, but the thought of going back home was igniting my strength to pick up my stride.

Greeted at the door I saw the many faces of the delighted flight attendants always smiling, giving you a thought of happiness along the way, I felt as if there was a switch that goes on and off, sometimes inhumane but felt real. As she guided me through the empty rows, she explained how joyous it is for me to go back home, while deep within I felt I already was home. But I agreed with her as to continue on the conversation.

My seat was tucked in facing a tame glass window overlooking the havoc, and on the right the Rolls Royce engine turns each blade while rotating peacefully.

I held my seat corners tight while on the other hand I squeezed the magazine as we were speeding up on the runway, the engines roared, as if I was in between a stampede of bulls. Stillness arose within the confusion in my head I felt it being not right, just a minute ago I was thrown in a bullfight of noise but now i felt empty as if my ears decided to nor hear. What I didn’t know is that I was asleep and this was a new experience as I never slept while flying, I just cant sleep, it could be because of the noise, anticipation, the movies, catering. Many things used to keep my eyes open, it refused to rest, but in this case it did.

Waking up, the cabin was illuminated by false stars lighting up the dark atmosphere. I looked at the map and we were over Erbil, Iraq and I was closer to home. I glanced down, imagined how it would be to live in Iraq amongst all the pandemonium, the cabin was pure silence, cold and free, how was it in the case of Erbil?

Peaking once again outside into another city, the darkness is too exciting, it is as if I hear whispers of people under, some of it happiness and some of despair, I imagined the conditions they were in and how they faced them. I thought to myself what’s next?

Darker skies arose, no sign of the moon, life is embracing me as I closed my eyes. What was I thinking? I guess when you’re gliding at 400km per second at 30,000 feet your thoughts tend to be limitless.

My thoughts may have consumed me for a while making me mindless of chaos.  Fiction decided to devour my senses yet reality slowly kicks in as I suddenly wake up sweeping me to the opaque skies I thought once again of where I was.

Home is near, and the empty space lights up as the sun shimmered on our arrival. My thoughts were muted for once I feel I am in serenity.

Welcome home, She said.

 

#travel #airline #thoughts